Bernie and Ert

Oh my gosh.
Did you know that Bernie and Ert were totally freaky, bizzaro, german versions of Bert and Ernie? What are those guys saying? What do the words that those guys are saying really mean? I think Bernie and Ert are totally funny.

Yes, I sure did. We receive emails from people who barely know any english.....you did very well. :D:D:D

No prob ... hope you understand my englisch :-)

Thank you Immortal!!!!!!!!!

HI,

My englisch is not very good, and the text is hard to translate, because most of the text is german slang.
It could be translate like this:

Berni and Ert ... today: cap, bald head (self-gratification)
Berni: horney !!!Hello Ert.
Ert: Ert, are you totally crazy? What are you doing.
Berni: What do you think? Iīm playing 4 against willi.
Ert: What???
Berni: Iīm roedel(donīt know the Englisch word) me one of the palm.
Ert: WHAT ????
Berni: Did you understand nothing you idiot ? cap,bald head, cap, bald head.
Ert: WHAAAAT ???
Berni: ahh Ert, I do my self
Ert: ah, you are playing with your sausage.
Berni: I peel my banana.
Ert: Ahh, you knocks your whistle.
Berni: Right, a Flute-solo.
Ert: U playing Squeeze bureau (concertina, accordion)
Berni: canīt translate.
Ert: I understand, you cook your own soup
Berni: Yes, I polish my meat whips.
Ert & Berni: LOL LOL LOL haa haaa
Ert: Did you know, Berni? I do it, too.
Berni: ihh. (like nasty, disgusting) [b]masturbator!!!! [/b]

Is there are translator in the house???:o